My Cup Runneth Over

Do you ever look at yourself in the mirror or in a photograph and stand in awe at all the ways you have grown? I am unsure if it is the golden hue of the sun reflected on my very fine skin or the classic joyful Tumisang Ramarea half smile, but something about this photo reminds me of all the ways I am blessed. Of course, blessed with my mother's good looks but blessed in so many other ways. For those who are curious, my skincare routine comprises primarily of water. You would be surprised what good hydration can do for your skin. I guess it reinforces the idea that the magic to life is hidden in the simple things. This post is a public testimony of the things I am grateful for in this season of my life. 

First I am grateful for myself. It is no secret that I am my number one fan - perhaps a bit too much. I am grateful for my unyielding and determined spirit. Without which I could not have endured the misfortune and hardship I have encountered thus far in life or pursued the challenging opportunities I have been granted. Those who are familiar with the highlights of my story might believe - as my story is often misrepresented - that I am a genius miracle worker who turns everything he touches into gold. But for every achievement of mine that is celebrated, there is about 9 or so failures that could have discouraged me or held me back. But my determined spirit has always understood that life is not a sprint, it is a marathon. So when I fall short of my aspirations, it has been easy to forgive myself and try again. May my cup never run dry of this persistence because it is what reassures me that at any given point in time, on average, I am doing the best I can to live my best life. 

Secondly I am grateful for love. There is an abundance of love in my life and for that my soul is nourished. From my family, friends, well-wishers, and my babe, I feel enveloped by this unbreakable force of love. As I have been learning recently the greater the love the greater the grief. Over the past few months I have lost so many people who were close to my heart and the grief is unquantifiable. As I work through that, I realize it is a reflection of the depth of the love that existed. As such it has inspired me to love my loved ones as best as I know how today because tomorrow is not always guaranteed. I know as I settle into my new life I have not been as reachable as usual, but I am working to find my new rhythm that I may continue to bask in the love today and independent of hope. I suspect to love purely is to love without hope, which is to love people as they are today and as much as possible independent of all their potential future selves. I am grateful to be loved and to love. 

Two months ago I started my career at Krikey as an Associate Product Manager and I can say without an ounce of doubt that I have my dream job. I am grateful to work on such a diverse team full of talented, supportive, and caring individuals. I am grateful to do work that challenges me to continue learning, that allows me to collaborate continuously, and to share my creative genius. When I was younger I had no idea what I wanted to be when I grew up. At first I gave the obvious choices - in part because that was all I knew - but then started thinking I was going to be a political leader. Now in my slightly grown state, I realize I am happiest when doing work that feeds my curiosity, inspires my creativity, allows me to be excellent, and reinforces my belief in ubuntu. I am grateful to start my career with my dream job. 

One of the biggest questions my spirit wrestles with is that of home. A preliminary answer I have is home ought to be a sanctuary, a place of peace and rejuvenation. It is where I can let all my defenses down and simply be. In my life I have found many homes - some in physical places and others in people. In this chapter of my life, my spirit felt it was time to find a physical home that can be that sanctuary and place of peace. So I moved into my first solo apartment, and I now live in a big city for the first time in my life. The village boy is now a city man. With an exception, I have had many great housemates across my lifetime but my introverted self felt it was time for a living situation that best nurtured my spirit - to live alone but with community nearby. 

Although my life is not without its troubles, I have so much to be grateful for. In fact it is these few blessings that remind me to hold on and keep pushing towards the life I aspire to live. I am not there yet, but I will enjoy every intermediate point towards that asymptote. I will enjoy Saturday morning walks in nature, weekend brunches with $20 mimosa pitchers, and community dinners with goat stew. I will enjoy beautiful music even though I cannot dance yet, and read books on Saturday afternoons. I will enjoy the thrill of driving on the fast lane on the freeway and the serenity of a sunset over the waves by the ocean. Tomorrow is not promised, but today I will live, I will laugh, and I will love. I hope you too remember to live your life as best as you know how.